Tag: Ha

A Visit to Banteay Srei Temple

Isvarapura, or Banteay Srei as it is known today, is an ancient Khmer temple located about 25 km north of Angkor Wat. Its “out of the way” location and insignificant size make Banteay Srei seemingly unimportant, however through inclusion in most tour packages, it sees a fair amount of visitors. Frequently referred to as “Citadel of the Women”, allegedly because it was the women who decorated it, its name kept popping up in most conversations I had with locals before and during my trips to Angkor. If the temple was completely off my radar before, soon after I started touring the temples of Angkor, the impression that Banteay Srei was a “must not miss” became apparent. From students whom I taught English at the Preah Prom Rath Pagoda, through my coconut friends at Angkor Wat all the way to the villagers from Sras Srang with whom I ended up spending most of my time in Cambodia, everybody kept asking me if I already paid Banteay Srei a visit. When I told them that I’d never even heard of that temple, everybody gasped for the air and insisted that I definitely include it in my plan. I had so much of the “citadel of the women” name enter my ears, I was afraid to look at the toilet paper after I wiped my butt off for fear that I’d see the name of the temple etched on it.

Photo: Gate in the Second Enclosing Wall to Banteay Srei
Photo: Gate in the Second Enclosing Wall to Banteay Srei

Road Trip to Banteay Srei

While all of the temples you would have heard of and wanted to visit prior to coming to Cambodia are located reasonably close to one another and can be visited in one go, a visit to Banteay Srei requires a detour that’ll eat a good chunk of the day on its own. Since everybody kept shoving that Banteay Srei hype down my throat, I decided to dedicate whole day to it and combine it with a road trip present for Ha and her daughter. I picked up Ha from the Temple Club after returning from a nighttime stay at Angkor Wat, made sure she gets good sleep and takes shower in warm water before leaving my air conditioned room the following day to see her daughter. As part of my surprise package, I started the day by giving Ha’s daughter a present, took a bunch of picture of the four year old girl wearing her new top and as soon as we were done, a we heard a tuk tuk pull over just outside of the room where Ha and her daughter lived. It was my student from the English class with whom I made prior arrangements.

I knew Ha didn’t have anything to do during the day, because she couldn’t score a job in Cambodia so there was zero risk of either her or her daughter being unable to go. So when the tuk tuk showed up and everybody kept wondering why it would come to that remote part of Siem Reap where no foreigners ever go, I simply told them to get dressed, because we’re taking a road trip to Banteay Srei. I had to explain to Ha that I didn’t know whether they’d be able to go inside the temple as all non Cambodians need an expensive entrance ticket, however should we fail sneaking them in as Cambodians, I’d just leave them in a nearby restaurant for a meal while I take off on my own to take a few pictures of the temple. The excitement was instantaneous. We picked up a few sandwiches from a store next to their hut and set off for an hour long ride to Banteay Srei on a tuk tuk.

It was a very, very hot day so a ride in a tuk tuk felt very refreshing. The movement of air kept washing sweat off our faces as we rode through Angkor and on to Banteay Srei. The excitement in voice and actions of Ha’s little girl was extraordinary. This was the first time in over a week that she got a chance to do something other than staying inside the shed her mother rented from her Cambodian uncle. It felt like family going on a family trip.

Banteay Srei Temple

In spite of its popularity, Banteay Srei is not as overrun with touts as temples in the main Angkor area. While area around Banteay Srei is as flat as elsewhere in central Cambodia, the immediate surroundings of the temple were rich in plant life growing out of well kept pools of water. Small exhibition hall with brief introduction on the temple can be found on the way to Banteay Srei from the parking lot.

Photo: Admiring Water Flowers at the Banteay Srei Exhibition Hall and Museum
Photo: Admiring Water Flowers at the Banteay Srei Exhibition Hall and Museum

Banteay Srei is the only main temple of Angkor that was not founded by a king. Its founder – Yajnavaraha – the grandson of king Harshavarman served as an ayurvedic medic and a priest during the reign of kings Rajendravarman and Jayavarman V. According to the stele inscription, Yajnavaraha had the temple completed by 967 AD and dedicated it to the Hindu god Tribhuvanamaheshvara (Shiva). The dedication to Shivanism is evident through intricate carvings covering the walls of the temple. Carvings in red sandstone are well preserved and seemingly the temple’s strongest tourist attractant. Many speculate that the fine art that these carvings represent could only be done by the hands of women, hence the temple’s title of the “Citadel of the Women”. Others however maintain that the name relates to the many reliefs of Apsaras (female dancers) found throughout the temple.

Banteay Srei Carvings

The most famous carvings on the walls and lintels of Banteay Srei portray the scenes from the life of Shiva, though parts of the temple were clearly also dedicated to Vishnu. In one of the triangular pediments above doorways, the demon Ravana is seen shaking Mount Kailasa above which Shiva is enthroned. In the same scene, Kama is seen arriving to disturb Shiva’s meditation. Other carvings portray “The Rain of Indra” or “The Killing of Kamsa” both of which are important stories from Indian mythology. Some of the carvings were moved to the Khmer museum in Phnom Penh and some are in Paris, France after being recovered from the hands of collectors who bought them from Cambodian looters. Apsaras stolen by French adventurer/thief André Malraux were also recovered and contributed to the popularity of the temple worldwide.

Thanks to vast funding from the Swiss government, Banteay Srei went through extensive restoration works so temple appears well preserved and carvings are in good shape. The Swiss government also financed the installation of a drainage system around the temple which prevented further damage to the structure by water. Despite vast investments from the Swiss, nothing could prevent the destruction of Banteay Srei by the locals who looted and vandalized the living bejeezus out of it. After the original statues were replaced with replicas, the locals vandalized the replicas. But their greed didn’t stop there. A typical Cambodian mindframe dictates that “if I can’t have it, at least I’ll destroy it”! As a result, after the statues of Vishnu and Uma were removed from Banteay Srei, they were assaulted by vandals while placed at the National Museum in Phnom Penh for safekeeping.

Photo: Banteay Srei Pediment Carvings Bear Creatures from Indian Hindu Mythology
Photo: Banteay Srei Pediment Carvings Bear Creatures from Indian Hindu Mythology

Banteay Srei – Conclusion

Banteai Srei is about an hour drive from Siem Reap town. It’s distance from Angkor proper (where most temples are located) makes a visit to Banteay Srei slightly inconvenient. It’s also a small sized temple so one would think that an extra long trip for this little would make no sense. Yet Banteay Srei receives more visitors than many larger temples on the Petit Circuit, including Banteay Kdei where my villager friends operate as touts. What makes Banteay Srei this popular are intricate carvings covering nearly every square inch of the temple. If elaborate, fine carvings are your thing, then made sure you don’t give Banteay Srei a miss.

The temple is also surrounded by nice water gardens which make the access to it more picturesque. I don’t know what they look like in dry season, but rainy season keeps them lush and rich, which offers great opportunities for photography. I am personally glad I went to visit Banteay Srei, but that was because I had 7 days to explore Angkor. If I only had a daily pass, I’d probably give this temple a pass. I’d likely pass on it with a 3 day pass also. However since vast majority of foreigners who visit Angkor do so on a single day pass and buy a tour package from their hotel, they do get to see Banteay Srei because tour companies have this temple included (and temples like Banteay Kdei excluded) in their packages. This is likely part of their marketing strategy. Through its red sandstone walls covered with exquisite carvings, a trip to Banteay Srei offers the visitors something different from majority of temples at Angkor proper. If I had wealthy clients, I’d take them to Banteay Srei too. Taking them to temples like Banteay Kdei, which are in more state of ruin and nigh identical to many other temples would be like showing them the same thing they had already seen.

Photo: Access to Banteay Srei Central Sanctuary is Prohibited
Photo: Access to Banteay Srei Central Sanctuary is Prohibited

BTW – both Ha and her daughter did get inside Banteay Srei even though only I had the pass. Being Vietnamese, Ha looks just as any Cambodian girl would and since she could speak a bit of Cambodian, we were able to fool the guard. It’s not like they would gain anything if they kicked them out and barred from from entering…

More photos of Banteay Srei can be found in the Banteay Srei Photo Gallery

Road Trip to Banteay Srei

This whole road trip idea was planned out to be a surprise for Ha and her daughter. I knew Ha couldn’t score a normal job in Cambodia – being both Vietnamese (keep in mind that Cambodians are extremely racist – just ask any Vietnamese person who’s ever visited Cambodia) and illegal to seek employment in Cambodia, so the only option she was left with was prostitution in Siem Reap‘s night clubs. However, the more time she spent with me, the wearier she kept getting of this whole idea of selling her body for money. Since she couldn’t have an actual job, Ha would the daytime with her daughter, as there was simply nothing other she could do. If I didn’t go to Angkor, she’d spend the day with me, but I needed to take advantage of good weather after waiting the rain out so I spent three consecutive days exploring the ancient temples, leaving the girls alone in Siem Reap.

Photo: Ha and Her Daughter on the Way to Banteay Srei Temple During Our Road Trip
Photo: Ha and Her Daughter on the Way to Banteay Srei Temple During Our Road Trip

I bought a 7 day pass to have enough time for even the more remote temples, but things went pretty smoothly so after three days, I had all of the temples on the Petit Circuit and the Grand Circuit covered, leaving me with 4 extra days to do the remote ones. The Petit and Grand Circuits are within main Angkor area where all of the famous and popular temples can be found, so by covering them all, I virtually had Angkor explored and everything on top of that would be an added bonus. One exception to this rule was the temple of Banteay Srei.

Banteay Srei

Banteay Srei temple is located about 25km from the main Angkor area (the area with where all famous and all biggest temple can be found – aka the area where most tourists go), however even though small in size, its intricate and elaborate carvings on red sandstone make Banteay Srei visually appealing so many organized tours include it in their itinerary. As a result, Banteai Srei, even though much smaller and significantly further away from Siem Reap, sees more visitors that Banteay Kdei – the temple on the Small Tour (Petit Circuit) where I made friends with villagers. While this is mostly a marketing pull on behalf of tour organizing companies, Banteai Srei did also gain notoriety among budget travelers which landed the temple a title of the “Jewel of Khmer Art”. As such, Banteai Srei is very overhyped and attracts tourists like honey attracts flies.

Needless to say – after being to all of the main Angkor temples, Banteai Srei was next on my radar. I knew Banteay Srei was 25 kilometers north of the main Angkor area, which all in all, would add up to being well over 30 km from Siem Reap, but since this part of Cambodia is completely flat, covering such distance on a bicycle wouldn’t be a problem. Sun and heat would be the biggest challenge, with potential of hostility from locals being close second. Afterall, being so far away from Siem Reap, all tourists who make it to Banteay Srei get there either in a bus as part of an organized tour, or by Tuk Tuk they hired in town. Omnipresent Tuk Tuks and motorcycles are fast moving and don’t draw much attention to themselves. Significantly slower moving bicycle with a foreigner on it, in an area of Cambodia far away from police patrolled streets of Siem Reap or Angkor… that sounded like a straight up death wish.

Photo: To Ensure Only APSARA Authority and Sokimex Can Rip Tourists Off at Angkor, Tuk Tuk Drivers Must Wear Specialty Vests with ID Number
Photo: To Ensure Only APSARA Authority and Sokimex Can Rip Tourists Off at Angkor, Tuk Tuk Drivers Must Wear Specialty Vests with ID Number

Road Trip

So instead of going all by me onesy on a bicycle, I decided to make my trip to Banteai Srei a Road Trip with guests and kill several birds with one stone. I could definitely do it on a bicycle, but after I took all other factors into consideration, the idea of a road trip prevailed. The undisputed advantages were:

1 – Tuk Tuk Ride

The idea of covering a long distance on a bicycle didn’t scare me. I was fit enough and enjoyed bike riding to the dot, but there were things in Cambodia a wise traveler never lets to slip his mind. But there was one even bigger reason why I had to consider a road trip on a Tuk Tuk and it goes back all the way to me teaching English at Wat Preah Prom Rath:

I have only been in Cambodia for less than 24 hours and I already taught a lecture in one of the classrooms at Preah Prom Rath. I enjoyed this experience profusely and was more than happy to volunteer my time to that cause as the students who attended the classes at the temple were ones who did not have a sponsor who would pay for a semester at a posh school. With me being part of their classes, they got more out of their lectures than students from incredibly overpriced schools such as the ACE – Australian Centre for Education. ACE – despite its high cost, is one incredibly useless school. If I were a parent of any of the kids who paid an incredible amount of money to attend that school, I’d demand a refund and get my kid the hell out of there. Most girls from the Sras Srang village where I ended up spending several months of my stay in Cambodia did attend ACE after sponsors paid for them, but day after day were forced to ask me to explain the lesson to them because they had no idea what it was about after attending a TESOL certified teacher lead class. After I explained it to them, then they understood, but there wasn’t one time in 5 months when any of the girls would return from the class and understand the topic of that day’s lecture.

Back to my English classes at Wat Preah Prom Rath – unfortunately for me, I came to Cambodia with an open mind and a will to dedicate myself to good causes. At the time, all one could find on the internet about Cambodia were utter lies. It took me all together 5 minutes to realize that Cambodians were hostile and that knowledge stayed from the moment I stepped foot on Cambodian soil, to the moment I left it. However even after being in the country for hours and already having experienced much of their hostility, I still lied to myself that there must be some good in Cambodia and if I keep my mind open, I would find it. It was a foolish thing to think.

Unfortunately, this type of mindset set me up for traps from which I could not get out of in the future. The students from my class instantly took advantage of the fact that I offered myself up to them with all openness and used each lecture to pressure me with business solicitations. As days went by and I realized that Cambodians are NOT those nice and friendly people travelers who fear reality make them to be, then I started to build a protective barrier between myself and the locals and didn’t allow anyone to take any more advantage of me, but this wasn’t until a few days after my arrival. During this first lecture of mine, as well as a few subsequent ones, I opened myself up and my students, instead of being grateful that I donated my time and knowledge to them for free, they took advantage of me and swarmed me with business hypes disguised as friendly chats. I reciprocated what I believed was merely an intention to have a friendly conversation with an English speaker, only to be forced into listening to pushy sales pitches from Tuk Tuk drivers and as they kept pressuring me and getting more and more in my face, the only way for me to escape was to eventually say OK to something.

They tried to force me into buying their services, but I told them I wanted to go for a walk that night so I couldn’t use them. Their response was that they would take me to see a sunset over a lake tomorrow then. And then that they would take me to the temples of Angkor. And then something again and again and again and again. From every angle, voices pressuring me more and more and cornering me and getting in my face until I had no choice but to say – “OK, I’ll let you know if I need a tuk tuk, G%$amn it!”

It was truly foolish of me to think that Cambodians would merely care to have a chat with someone from abroad. It’s not the case. It’s never been the case and not even after 5 months in Cambodia it ever happened to be one. But I wasn’t prepared for this to be a fact when I just came there and once a Cambodian forces you into even remotely implying something, then they’re gonna remind you of it day in and day out. And so they did remind me of that time when I said “OK”. Surprise!!!

Tuk Tuk drivers are an incredibly awful lot. They made every minute of my stay in Cambodia outside of my room a nightmare. If I had Ha with me, I could not finish a single damn sentence without one getting in my face and rudely interrupting. As a result, I would not give any of them any business just on principle. If I needed to go somewhere, I’d rather walk in that heat than give a Tuk Tuk driver a penny. Needless to say, they would still bother the living crap out of me, but at least I wouldn’t pay them anything. So it was not easy to actually get one on my own terms and offer him a gig of taking me to Banteay Srei for a road trip. But since this would shake off one of the traps Cambodians caught me in when I was too trusty, I said – why not?

Photo: Ha and Her Daughter at the Entrance Gate to Banteay Srei
Photo: Ha and Her Daughter at the Entrance Gate to Banteay Srei

2 – Fun Day for Ha and Her Daughter

Hellz yeah – to Ha and her daughter, every day was a struggle to survive (as it was for me, but for completely different reasons) with basically no chance to do anything fun. To Ha, every morning started with thoughts of worry about how she was going to buy food for her little girl. When simple day to day survival becomes your #1 priority, you don’t have the resources to buy basic necessities beyond food, let alone take your kid on a road trip. And knowing darn well how much hardship Ha and her daughter already went through, I instantly realized that affording them a simple day of simple joy would mean the world to them.

And this was the main reason why I opted for a road trip on a tuk tuk, rather than a self ride on a bicycle to Banteai Srei. A tuk tuk can seat up to 4 people easily, so taking Ha and her daughter along wouldn’t cost me any more than going on my own. And even though had I not met Ha, I would still have gone by bicycle, despite pressure from my students, knowing that by taking Ha and her daughter out for a day of fun, I could visit an extra temple without risking a ride through potentially hostile territory, and I would shake off the obligation my students forcibly placed upon me, I saw nothing but pure WIN for everyone in this arrangement.

Photo: Admiring Water Flowers at the Banteay Srei Exhibition Hall and Museum
Photo: Admiring Water Flowers at the Banteay Srei Exhibition Hall and Museum

The only trouble was that the night prior to intended road trip I did not make it to the class, because I stayed at Angkor Wat for night photography. I already had my present for Ha’s daughter with me, but I really wanted to make the day when I give it to her even more special. I wanted to take them away from the worries they experience every day and set their mind on something positive – while they are together, and myself with them. So despite being exhausted and wet (it rained like all hell during my nighttime stay at Angkor and I rode back home in that rain), instead of heading home to take shower and relax a bit, I headed straight for Pub Street and started looking for a tuk tuk driver from my class. Since Pub Street is where majority of foreigners who stay in Siem Reap go after dark, that is where majority of Siem Reap’s tuk tuk drivers aggregate after dark. I knew I stood a decent chance of finding him there as ratio of tuk tuk drivers to foreigners in Siem Reap is rather unfavorable (more tuk tuk drivers than tourists).

Luckily for me – he was there, hiding from the rain under the roof of his tuk tuk. I made arrangements with him, told him when and where to come the following day and told him where and how many of us are going. All set and done, I was ready to go to my room, make myself human again and head over to the Temple Club to meet with Ha so I could take her home with me for a warm shower and comfy sleep. I told her not that I had a gift for her daughter and that after the gift, I was taking them for a road trip to Banteay Srei. I kept it a surprise until the last moment and it paid off big time. Not only did the girls have their first worry free, fun day in a long time, it was also the first time for the little girl in years to feel like she had a father. I may not have made her, but she was in daddy’s arms the whole time. I do not have the words to describe how much it meant to them and to me, but what I got back in child’s laughter and mother’s tears has made an impact you can’t replicate.

Present for Ha’s Daughter

After my first meeting with Ha’s daughter, I knew it wasn’t going to be our last. This sort of caught me off guard as all my recent encounters with kids were negative – either trained clowns able to fake-cry on command, going out of their way to get money off of you and telling you to F%$k off if you don’t give it to them, or screaming the entire flight turning an already exhausting experience into a nightmare from hell – so if you even remotely brought up anything to do with kids, I would have told you to keep them as far away from me as possible so nobody gets hurt. But bubbly personality Ha’s daughter was radiating got the best of me.

After I embarked on my third day of Angkor exploring, I took on the Grand Circuit in a counter-clockwise direction with a mandatory stop at my new-found friends’ from the Sras Srang village. The temple of Banteay Kdei was about 12 km away from where I stayed in Siem Reap, and just a corner turn away from the Grand Circuit which made it a perfect, strategic stop to recharge on energy with coconut water and cool off the sweat the ride so far has resulted in. But I also had an extra plan for the stop at Banteai Kdei.

When I first went with Ha to see her daughter, I made a quick stop at a convenience store to buy candy. I thought it would make a kid happy and pre-occupied enough to leave me the hell alone. It did make her happy – beyond happy – but it didn’t keep her off of me, though by that time I didn’t mind. Obviously, buying the kid a simple thing which her mother could not afford to buy meant a world to the little girl. Anticipating my next meeting with her, I thought I was gonna buy something more sustainable and less damaging to her already spoilt teeth. I had to take two things into an account:

  • No matter where in Siem Reap I go, I’d get ripped off
  • Ha was always by my side, except from times when I was at Angkor

I wanted to make it a surprise so buying anything in Siem Reap would defeat this idea. And since any business in Siem Reap would try to rip me off as much as any tout at Angkor Archaeological Park would, there was no benefit to buying in town over buying at Angkor. On top of it all – my relationship with the Sras Srang villagers was nicely developing so I thought I’ll get the best of both world and buy something for Ha’s daughter from them.

As much as I enjoyed the company of the villagers, they were still Cambodians and I was still a foreigner. For them it’s always an “Us Against Them” game so as I kept spending more and more time with them, but buying nothing except a whole pile of coconuts every day, they continued bugging me and requesting that I fall for their sales pitch and spend more money. Under normal circumstances, I would not give in to the pressure of pestering touts (except that one time when the little girl tout who broke into tears after a would-be customer bought from somebody else), but since I wanted to buy Ha’s daughter something anyway, so why not from my new friends? Whom better to support financially than people with whom I was gonna spend several month with (though at the time I didn’t quite know it yet)? So I did just that. It didn’t ease the pressure one bit, but gave me an extra argument to counter theirs with when they tried to force me into buying some more.

Granted, everything they sell at Angkor is a piece of junk. There are basically two types of items you can buy: bootlegs of all sorts and miserable quality t-shirts. I didn’t have many options so I went for a low quality t-shirt. I’m not very good at buying presents so I had to make it easy on myself. The biggest challenge I was faced with was trying to guess the right size for Ha’s daughter. They had children sized tops with elephants on them in both small and medium. I asked my friends to get some four year old girl touts to come over so I can test the size on them. Since Ha’s daughter was the same age and racial differences are minimal between the Vietnamese and the Cambodians, I thought this was gonna help me choose the right size. I ended up going with medium sized top as small seemed as though it was meant for infants. I also thought buying the top that’s a bit too big would be better in a long run than getting one that’s a bit too small. The four year olds grow big quickly, so if the garment is a tad large right now, it’ll fit just fine later. Whereas if it’s already tight, it’s gonna be completely unusable very soon.

My suspicion was correct – the medium sized top was still a bit too big for her, but that mattered not. Both Ha and her daughter were beaming with delight when I pulled the top out of my camera bag and handed it to the little girl. I haven’t seen this much happiness in a very long time. The girl was so excited she instantly wanted to pose for pictures with her new top on. She loved having her pictures taken and as a photographer, I loved taking them. Four year old, but so photogenic and just shining with glamour. Little did they know at the time that this was naught but the beginning. The main surprise of the day was yet to come.

Gallery of pictures I took of Ha’s daughter wearing the top I bought her from the villagers at Banteay Kdei temple is below:

End of a Career as a Prostitute

Visiting Angkor Wat was a big item on my Bucket List so I was glad that after more than a week of being in Cambodia but being unable to go see the ancient temples due to daily downpours, the weather improved and I got a stretch of several consecutive days of sunshine. It was getting kind of weird because I continued to teach English at the Preah Prom Rath Temple every day and my students kept asking me the same thing they ask every foreigner (Cambodian way to start a conversation to eventually swerve it into an attempt to make money off you) – “how do you like Angkor Temples?” I could only answer by saying: “I don’t know, I haven’t been to Angkor yet.” And everybody would stare at me with gaping mouth cause it seemed like I’ve already been there for ages. I assured everyone that it is my foremost interest to do a thorough exploration of the Archeological Park, but I wanted it to be a memorable experience so I patiently waited bad weather out.

Then the day the weather improved I met Ha so on my first hot and sunny day in Cambodia, I just looked around realizing that this was to be my opportunity to see Angkor at last, but instead I’m spending my time with a girl I met in a bar the night before. That didn’t bother me one bit, though. Angkor temples have been there for centuries. I knew they wouldn’t run away and as I kept getting to know Ha a little better, I was truly glad I got to spend some quality time with her. Then I got to meet her daughter and everything inside of me changed.

I still wanted to pursue my dream of visiting Angkor Wat at the earliest suitable time but above all else, I had to keep my wits with me and never take anything for granted. I mean – there was not a slightest sign of lie in Ha’s eyes or voice, but she was still a girl I just met in a bar. I can read people really well, but I never place all my bets on one card. After a nice day spent together with Ha and her daughter, a day I would have made my first day at Angkor had I not met her, I told her that the following day and each day thereafter, if the weather was nice, I would leave early in the morning and head on my bicycle for Angkor. There would be no knowing when I would come back, and I still wanted to continue with my English classes in the evening, but come nightfall, I’d definitely be already kicking around Siem Reap so if she was up for that, we could hang out together then. My thinking was – if we are meant to meet again, we will so there was no reason to put Angkor off any longer.

After my first day at Angkor, I went to check if Ha was at the Temple Club but didn’t see her there so I left only to be halted by her friend (aka another prostitute on a lookout for a customer) who noticed me at the very last moment and sent Ha after me. This was the only night after the night I met Ha when she tried her luck as a prostitute in a bar. It didn’t work out, nobody picked her up so she went with me and told me that the following day, even if it’s nice again and I end up going to Angkor again, she would just come straight to my room to spend the night with me instead of trying for any more customers in a bar.

I was plain and simple the worst type of guy she could have ended up going with on her first night out as a prostitute. She didn’t want to sell her body, but needed money for her daughter and this was her only option. The feelings of not really wanting to do that were suppressed by the necessity to provide for her child. But then I came along and not only re-ignited those feelings, I made them so much stronger she could no longer suppress them. This was the end of her “career” as a prostitute. With that however, I unwittingly took upon myself the responsibility to provide for both of them. I was on a budget to begin with, but I could see that every penny spent on food for those two girls was money I could not have spent any better.

Photo: What Life Does Future Hold For These Two?
Photo: What Life Does Future Hold For These Two?

I gave Ha a little bit of money each day so she could buy the most necessary groceries to keep them from starving while I was gone and when I was around and went to visit Ha’s daughter, I always bought her some sweets and treats. The joy in that little girl’s eyes made the money spent so worth it. But the more time I spent with them, the more I learned about what they have and are going through and it kept bothering me beyond belief. Ha and her daughter were betrayed by the whole world. They could not stay in their homeland of Vietnam because little girl’s wealthy father had his men after them and out there in the foreign lands there was just no reasonable way for them to make any money. What chance for a normal life does anybody like them have?

Feeding Monkeys of Angkor Thom

After I was done exploring the Chapel of the Hospital, I was already so worn out by the scorching Cambodian sun, I didn’t have any strength left for any more temples. The day was drawing to a close anyway and I spent much of it battling the heat and the relentless touts so it was time to call it quits and start making my way back to Siem Reap. That heat definitely gets you. There is absolutely nowhere to escape the boiling hot temperatures within Angkor Archaeological Park so sooner or later, you’re bound to humbly yield to this mighty element hours of unceasing exposure to which will floor you. Luckily for me, Chapel of the Hospital was the last temple ruin on the Petit Circle through Angkor Archaeological Park I have not been to yet so I could consider this part of my Angkorian adventure successfully concluded. I only had one more stop to make – to get one more coconut at Angkor Wat just before they close the park for the day and night falls on the area. To get to Angkor Wat, I had to first ride through Angkor Thom the southern end of which gets busy with monkeys looking for handouts from people heading home this time of the day.

Photo: Angkor Thom Monkeys Feeding on Food from Humans
Photo: Angkor Thom Monkeys Feeding on Food from Humans

I was only steps away from Angkor Thom as the Chapel of the Hospital is very near the Victory Gate so I rode right through and then left at the Terrace of the Elephants, and straight down to pass by Bayon and further along the road leading to the South Gate. It was on this stretch of the road – between Bayon and the South Gate where hundreds of monkeys seem to descend from the jungle to look cute as they prance alongside the road to entice the visitors to Angkor to pause on their way back to Siem Reap and have a picture of themselves taken with them while at the same time feeding them. Needless to say, this dependency of monkeys on food from humans is bad for the wildlife and could have detrimental consequences but in Cambodia nobody cares as long as in the end there is some profit for them in it. And if engaging foreigners in feeding monkeys gets them all excited to spend money on overpriced seeds to give the anxious animals, they won’t let that opportunity to pass them by. Wildlife and all tree huggers can go eff themselves. Cambodians want tourists’ money. They care less if it results in gradual dependency of wild monkeys on humans and loss of their ability to fend for themselves.

Photo: Visitors to Angkor Thom Feeding Wild Monkeys
Photo: Visitors to Angkor Thom Feeding Wild Monkeys

There was a pretty sizable group of people engaged in monkey feeding along the road out of Angkor Thom. I got attracted by the crowd and paused to see what was so engaging about this tree-lined road to have everyone stop and hang around. I pulled over and pulled out my camera to take a few pictures to document what’s going on, but that didn’t go without attention from the monkeys who seem to switch their focus on a newcomer almost immediately, unless a person whom they are around is currently feeding them. As I had observed – they (the monkeys) are rather ungrateful creatures when it comes to that. People would spend money to feed them and for as long as their supply of monkey munchies lasts, the monkeys are all over them but as soon as they’re out, monkeys ungracefully move on to somebody else forgetting all about that original donor.

There were monkeys of all shapes and sizes along that road – from young and agile to old and grumpy. And they are uncontrollably attracted to shiny things and… well, basically all things that they can carry. Insatiably curious and investigative, these monkeys will steal anything that can be stolen. Put your bag on the ground to free your hands so you can feed a monkey that starts to cutely climb up your leg and next thing you know, other monkeys are already in the bag and if they grabbed something, consider it gone. They will climb up a nearest tree and you will see your possessions disappear before you’re able to do anything about it. I already had my scary encounter which nearly cost me a camera equipment before getting to Angkor Wat so I knew that one needs to watch their stuff really closely and have it safely mounted against themselves or put into something that’s tricky to open and unmovable. But as I stood there and had a few monkeys probe my wallet and key chain and my bag I had over my shoulders, I saw one lady lose her sunglasses after a monkey snatched it off the top of her head and disappeared into the crown of the tree above.

Photo: Monkey at Angkor Thom Creeping In to Check Out What He Could Steal
Photo: Monkey at Angkor Thom Creeping In to Check Out What He Could Steal

Once my presence away from the main group attracted attention of way too many monkeys, I perceived it was time to move on. I mounted my steel horse and rode off to have my last coconut of the day at Angkor Wat and then head back to my room in Prom Roth Guesthouse. I was looking forward to meeting with Ha again in the evening.

How a Prostitute Works

Ha really needed to make some money so she can buy food for her daughter, but because she was an alien in a foreign country, her options were slim. All she was left with was prostitution. Because I had evenings reserved to getting some computer work done for myself, I had to leave to her to look after my job during which time she said she would go back to the Temple Club and “work” the way prostitutes “work”. Because Siem Reap is not a sex tourism destination, chances were that she would just spend the night looking pretty but not scoring any paying customers. I knew very well how prostitutes work and how they get treated and was not happy knowing Ha was going to put herself up on the market again, but this was her only option at the moment. I told her she could come stay the night with me again after “work”. I had actual shower and could keep the room at a comfortable temperature level. Plus the beds were comfortable so at least she could get decent sleep.

Ha gave her daughter good byes and lay her in wooden plank bed to sleep. Then we left for the Pub Street so she can promenade herself at the Temple Club and so I can sit in the Khmer Family Restaurant and do some work on a computer. Again, I wasn’t too happy Ha was forced to sell her body out, but I didn’t have the funds to support two more mouth myself and she didn’t have any other options either, so work of a prostitute it was.

This was a rather sticky situation, but I did all I could to offer assistance. I provided Ha with shower and sleep facilities at no charge, took her out for meals with me and bought treats for her daughter. I think I made their tough lives a little bit better without resorting to giving them the money.

I was done with my work at around midnight and briefly popped in the Temple Club to meet Ha and see how her night went. I was ready for the possibility that she may not be there – which would indicate that she may have scored a “customer” and is “working” to earn money. Horrible feeling but it was the fact of her life at the time.

Oddly enough, I went through all of the Temple Club and didn’t see Ha anywhere so I left. I was sort of happy for her, hoping she scored a whale who would pay her a lot of cash for her “services” but at the same time I was sad to have to go home alone. Even though she did not do the “work” with me, I enjoyed her company and loved talking with her.

Photo: Temple Club Where Ha Went to Work as a Prostitute
Photo: Temple Club Where Ha Went to Work as a Prostitute

As I was about to leave the line of Tuk Tuk drivers at the beginning of Pub Street, I felt someone jump on me. Warm embrace and lovable laughter gave Ha away. She said she’d been at the Temple Club whole evening but no luck scoring any customers. She didn’t see me either, but one other girl who also works at the club noticed me and remembered me from previous night. Knowing I was looking for Ha, she let her know that her man just went through the club obviously looking for someone, but hasn’t found her so he left. She must have thought I took Ha with me the night before to have sex with and was looking for her again to do the same thing this night as well. Being a nice fellow-prostitute, she let Ha know and that’s how she caught me just before I would have disappeared in the gloomy darkness of the street that leads to the Prom Roth Guesthouse.

This was good news. I really didn’t want any men abusing this wonderful girl and at the same time I wanted to enjoy her company myself. On top of it, I wanted her to get decent sleep and be able to take decent shower so I was glad she didn’t score a customer that night. But that also meant that she wouldn’t have any money for her daughter so I would have to support her somehow. I was gonna do it like this:

Get up reasonably early in the morning to see whether it’s a nice sunny day again. If the day was going to be nice, I would sit on a bike and ride to Angkor to visit the ancient temples at last. Because the entrance fee to Angkor Archaeological Park is very expensive, there was no way I could also take Ha with me. This meant that if the weather was nice, Ha would have to go her own way while I’m at Angkor. We would still meet in the evening, but wouldn’t be able to spend the day together.

Whereas if it rains, we would just go ahead with an alternative program which wouldn’t involve me going to Angkor, because I wasn’t gonna waste $20 for not even being able to take a picture of any temples because when it rains in Cambodia during rainy season, it really comes down.

Either way, I would take Ha to have a breakfast with me and would buy large meal so she has left-overs to feed her daughter with. This way I would still support Ha and her little girl without giving them money directly. I needed to eat before heading to Angkor so this step would be unavoidable and since she was spending the night with me, she could come along.

This plan went pretty well, except from one thing – we were forced to get up much sooner than I would have liked. Because Pchum Ben festival was still underway, Preah Prom Rath temple which was just outside my window started playing really loud Khmer music out of their old loudspeakers. Music was so loud, we were virtually wide awake shortly after 6am. I have originally appreciated the fact that Prom Roth Guesthouse is so close to one of the main temples in Siem Reap, but the fact that you won’t get enough sleep because of proximity to that temple made it a bit crappy.

This same thing has repeated every day for the rest of the Pchum Ben festival. I’m not an early bird and I work until late at night because I find working at night more productive and more creative. But with the noise from Preah Prom Rath temple early morning for a few days straight, this was becoming excessively difficult.

Regardless, I was excited to go see Angkor Wat at last. The weather was gorgeous and I knew this was the day. I was woken up sooner than I would have liked, but I was excited to go see my most desired site in the world so I sprung out of bed, shook Ha to get up too, we got dressed and headed to Wat Bo area to have nice traditional breakfast in one of the locally owned and operated restaurants. I had to say my good-byes to Ha right after, but that was only for the day. I knew I was gonna see her again in the evening so I did not waste any more time, and rode off north, towards Angkor Archaeological Park.

It’s Hard Being a Foreigner in Siem Reap

Ha introduced me to the hardship she and her daughter were going through, yet even though unintentionally, she was introduced to the hardship I was going through myself – the hardship of being a foreigner in Siem Reap. I didn’t have to say a word, all it took was for Ha to spend some time with me. After a brief while she acknowledged that being a foreigner in Cambodia is truly horrible, because of treatment we westerners receive from locals.

First of all, when I was talking to Ha, I was never able to finish a simple sentence without being interrupted by a pushy Cambodian eager to get money from me at any cost. I would be walking down the street, minding my own business yet because of my skin color, I would be treated like cheap hooker. I’d be yelled yet, clapped at from across the street, honked at, whistled at or just plain have somebody in my face doing his darn best to talk me into buying something from them. There was no end to this abuse and there was not a single minute I would get without being bothered.

No matter where we would go or what we would do, there would be locals jumping me and insisting on doing some business with them. They never take “No” for an answer and treat bothering foreigners almost religiously. It’s as if something terrible would happen if each of them who caught a sight of me (or anyone else who looks like an obvious foreigner) would not make some kind of move at me, whether verbally, by making obnoxious noises or by getting in my face directly.

This is the real Cambodia – extremely hostile towards foreigners and beyond pushy. Ha has never experienced anything like that because she’s Vietnamese and looks too close to being a Cambodian. But as she was there with me, she could see how much I as a westerner have to put up with and how Cambodians would not take NO for an answer and would continue bothering me even if I completely ignored them. It was frustrating the crap out of her and she was not even the victim.

I think every Cambodian should try hanging around with a foreigner to see what it is like when a person doesn’t get a minute of peace without being harassed by a local. And I really hate to sound like I’m exaggerating, but when I say “a minute of peace” I’m actually being excessively generous. If it was only once per minute that some local jumps me, perhaps I wouldn’t even bother writing this post. But Cambodians go way above and beyond harassment. It is virtually nonstop – as a foreigner you get harassed at virtually every moment.

We had to leave talking to when we are in the room as that was the only place where I could finish a sentence without being interrupted by a pushy local. Courtesy and respect are not virtues known to Cambodians. Personal space means nothing to them so they will stick their noses straight in your face and won’t remove them easily. It almost seems as though their strategy at earning your business is to frustrate you to the point at which you eventually give in. Instead of trying to earn your business by offering quality service, they simply believe that after you have been harassed enough, you will eventually break and agree to accept their Tuk Tuk ride or whatever it is they want you to spend money on.

Photo: Siem Reap Tuk Tuk Driver Looking Out for Foreigners
Photo: Siem Reap Tuk Tuk Driver Looking Out for Foreigners

Being a foreigner in Cambodia is truly hard. Most locals or people from the hood would not realize what we foreigners have to go through in Cambodia, but those who try to hang out with one of us will get a first person feel of what it’s like. And what it’s really like is anything but pretty. Ha knows it very well and felt sorry for me. It got to a point when she would jump pushy locals back and scream at them in Cambodian to leave me alone. While I was at the end with my senses despite ignoring all pushy locals, Ha stood up for me and tried to beat off some of that unceasing abuse. Ha introduced me to the hardship she and her daughter were going through, yet even though unintentionally, she was introduced to the hardship I was going through myself – the hardship of being a foreigner in Siem Reap. I didn’t have to say a word, all it took was for Ha to spend some time with me. After a brief while she acknowledged that being a foreigner in Cambodia is truly horrible, because of treatment we westerners receive from locals.

First of all, when I was talking to Ha, I was never able to finish a simple sentence without being interrupted by a pushy Cambodian eager to get money from me at any cost. I would be walking down the street, minding my own business yet because of my skin color, I would be treated like cheap hooker. I’d be yelled yet, clapped at from across the street, honked at, whistled at or just plain have somebody in my face doing his darn best to talk me into buying something from them. There was no end to this abuse and there was not a single minute I would get without being bothered.

No matter where we would go or what we would do, there would be locals jumping me and insisting on doing some business with them. They never take “No” for an answer and treat bothering foreigners almost religiously. It’s as if something terrible would happen if each of them who caught a sight of me (or anyone else who looks like an obvious foreigner) would not make some kind of move at me, whether verbally, by making obnoxious noises or by getting in my face directly.

This is the real Cambodia – extremely hostile towards foreigners and beyond pushy. Ha has never experienced anything like that because she’s Vietnamese and looks too close to being a Cambodian. But as she was there with me, she could see how much I as a westerner have to put up with and how Cambodians would not take NO for an answer and would continue bothering me even if I completely ignored them. It was frustrating the crap out of her and she was not even the victim.

I think every Cambodian should try hanging around with a foreigner to see what it is like when a person doesn’t get a minute of peace without being harassed by a local. And I really hate to sound like I’m exaggerating, but when I say “a minute of peace” I’m actually being excessively generous. If it was only once per minute that some local jumps me, perhaps I wouldn’t even bother writing this post. But Cambodians go way above and beyond harassment. It is virtually nonstop – as a foreigner you get harassed at virtually every moment.

We had to leave talking to when we are in the room as that was the only place where I could finish a sentence without being interrupted by a pushy local. Courtesy and respect are not virtues known to Cambodians. Personal space means nothing to them so they will stick their noses straight in your face and won’t remove them easily. It almost seems as though their strategy at earning your business is to frustrate you to the point at which you eventually give in. Instead of trying to earn your business by offering quality service, they simply believe that after you have been harassed enough, you will eventually break and agree to accept their Tuk Tuk ride or whatever it is they want you to spend money on.

Being a foreigner in Cambodia is truly hard. Most locals or people from the hood would not realize what we foreigners have to go through in Cambodia, but those who try to hang out with one of us will get a first person feel of what it’s like. Then they would change their approach instantly. After meeting with and speaking to countless foreigners in Siem Reap, I could see that this approach hurts local businesses. Foreigners who would otherwise spend more money refuse to go shopping so they don’t have to expose themselves to this treatment and those who would otherwise stay longer are making plans to speed up their departure as they can’t put up with this anymore.

There is no doubt that disrespect of foreigners has opposite of desired effect for locals. Because of that, even if there are any sincere locals who would like to offer sincere service to foreigners, they will be ignored because foreigners are pushed to the limits and have no other option but to ignore. You can see which foreigner has just come to Siem Reap and is still hanging on to being polite and responds multiple times every minute to being jumped by explaining that they are OK for now. You see the same foreigner a few hours later and without responding, they are speedily moving towards their guesthouse to escape the mistreatment.

Because Ha looks like a Cambodian, she was not subjected to abuse but it only took her a few hours of hanging out with me to get fed up with that herself. It got to a point when she would jump pushy locals back and scream at them in Cambodian to leave me alone. While I was at the end with my senses despite ignoring all pushy locals, Ha stood up for me and tried to beat off some of that unceasing abuse.

I Can’t Stand Kids No More

It’s funny how we sometimes can’t stand certain things yet in the end it’s that very thing that makes us love them. This is exactly what happened to me. I had bad experiences with kids and it got to a point that I couldn’t stand kids anymore but it only took that one kid to make me see them in a whole new light and now I can say that I can’t stand kids no more (no more being the keyword).

When Ha told me she had a child, I had all kinds of weird thoughts. I’ve never had children of my own so my perception of them has always been rather third handed. The last memory I had of kids was that of a horrible plane experience. Each of my three flights from Edmonton to Siem Reap, Cambodia had annoying, screaming kids on board who would not quit yelling for one minute. As if being cramped within a small space, with limited legroom for 10 hour was not bad enough, I also had to listen to nonstop screaming that started before takeoff and didn’t stop until I got off the plane. Long flights tire you down a lot, but having someone scream without a break while you’re at it takes it to a whole new level by giving you a headache from hell.

After this type of experience with kids, I really didn’t feel like coming in further contact with children, no matter how presumably well behaved they were believed to be. That’s why I couldn’t grasp the concept of Ha loving her child. My first thought when she told me that she had a daughter was – “Why don’t you just get rid of it somehow and be done with her? She’ll be no burden to you no more…” I thought she’d be happy if someone wanted to rid her of that kid… I thought she’d grab at the first opportunity to be done with the girl and move on with her life without the annoyance of a spoiled, screaming kid.

Yet she kept mentioning how much her daughter meant to her and how she couldn’t imagine life without her so I just silently wondered what the heck was wrong with her and politely nodded to each of her daughter-full heart pours.

We were at the Royal Independence Gardens admiring the shriek of mesmerising Fruit Bats when Ha told me it was time for her to go home to check out on her daughter and insisted that I go with her. She wanted me to meet the little girl and said she would pay for the Tuk Tuk so long as I come. I was not impressed with the idea, but she had spent whole night with me and went with me to see the bats (aka she went where I wanted her to go) so I somewhat felt obliged to return the favour and go where she would like me to go.

It was a beautiful day but there would be no way for me to use it to initiate my Angkor Archaeological Park exploration adventure and since I had nothing more exciting lined up for today, I agreed I would accompany Ha to her uncle’s place where she was staying and meet her daughter. I really enjoyed Ha’s company and wanted her to spend more of the day with me, but for that she needed to go home to change clothes and do whatever other things she needed to do so it only made sense that I would go with her.

We flagged down a Tuk Tuk, the driver saw me which meant he tried to overcharge us for the ride but Ha put him in place and we headed towards the north east corner of Siem Reap, to an area far away from where any foreigners ever go. The houses there looked the way most Cambodian houses do – thatched barns on stilts made exclusively of wooden planks. This is what most Cambodians live in and so did Ha’s uncle and his wife who accommodated Ha during her stay in Siem Reap.

The house had a little storage room attached to itself at the front end, it was only big enough to have one bed also made of bare wooden planks inside and that’s where Ha and her daughter were staying. Roof was covered with random, irregularly shaped pieces of metal, wood and thatch, with many holes that let water in when it was raining. Since there was nowhere to hide inside of that room and since it was rainy season, the two ladies must have been getting rained on on regular basis. From a westerner’s point of view, it looked like something I wouldn’t even throw a dog to live in and here it was used as the only way by a 23 year old girl and her 4 year old daughter. But the worst part was, that they had to pay (unreasonably high) monthly rent for it.

Photo: Big Lizard Crawling Down The Base of the House Where Ha and Her Daughter Lived
Photo: Big Lizard Crawling Down The Base of the House Where Ha and Her Daughter Lived

From what Ha explained to me, her uncle wanted to actually help her out and wouldn’t mind leaving her in the room for free, but his wife (Who is Cambodian – typical) was against and decided to cash on a desperate couple that didn’t have many options and had to take whatever was offered to them. Way to make a bank on other people’s misfortune.

This was how Ha and her daughter lived. No wonder she was so excited to accept my invitation to sleep with me in an air conditioned room, on a soft bed with blankets and with shower with clean water. Coming from a dog house that looked like slaves storage facility, anything would be an upgrade.

Photo: Home Made Decoration Reflected The Condition of the House
Photo: Home Made Decoration Reflected The Condition of the House

But let’s get back to kids and how I couldn’t stand them. After I had met with Ha’s daughter, my hatred for kids was gone. I started to understand what she meant when she said that she loved her daughter and could not imagine her life without her. I started to understand where the beauty of small children lies. My perception of children was wrong, but was I in for a surprise! If at some time I couldn’t stand kids, then after meeting Ha’s daughter this feeling was in me no more.

Photo: Little Girl Showing Me Where She Lives
Photo: Little Girl Showing Me Where She Lives

More photos of this little girl in the 4 Year Old Daughter Photo Gallery.

Four Year Old Daughter Photo Gallery

When I first met Ha’s four year old daughter, the little girl was crying. I had some chewing gums on me so I gave her the pack which made her stop. I don’t know exactly why she was crying, but I know that she was nothing like I expected. I went to meet with Ha’s daughter anticipating a spoiled kid that screams all the time and acts like a general irritation, but she was none of that.

I will leave the pictures in a gallery below to speak on my behalf. Even if you were like me – someone who used to perceive kids as sheer annoyance, you would instantly start seeing children as a blessing, instead of a curse. This girl was the embodiment of cuteness and was well behaved and respectful. She was nothing like the kids from the plane. I was reluctant to go spend time with a kid, but after experiencing her bubbly personality, I actually had to pull my camera out and snap some pictures so I can print some for Ha.

Realizing the hardship Ha told me about, I felt even more inclined to try to seek for solution and help so they don’t have to spend their lives running and hiding. This little girl should go to school and get education. She should also get some medical care, including dental care because that cavity in her front tooth spoils otherwise gorgeous smile. This girl deserves to enjoy her childhood and go out to have fun with her friends. But for this to happen, something would have to get fixed. The two are constantly on the move so she can’t make any friends and because they don’t have any money, their health issues are not looked after. They can’t afford a toothbrush or a toothpaste so cavities are inevitable. And that makes their story so much sadder.

Because father of this girl is an American, she doesn’t look obviously Vietnamese. WHile she does have some Vietnamese features, she’s a Caucasian cross with dark eyes.

Flying Fruit Bats Picture Gallery

I wanted to take Ha to the Royal Independence Gardens – my favourite place in Siem Reap. I really like it there so I thought she’d enjoy it too. And since it was a beautiful day I was not gonna use to go to Angkor Wat, I thought of at least taking my camera with a telephoto lens to the gardens and try to snap some pictures of the Fruit Bats Flying so the day doesn’t go to waste entirely.

I fully realized that taking pictures of the Fruit Bats flying during the day was not gonna be easy, but I still wanted to give it a try. Bats are nocturnal animals so coming to them during daytime would mean catching them in the middle of sleep but with a little bit of patience, I may be able to see some of them flying. From what I have noticed, Fruit Bats are pretty vicious with one another and fight a lot when they are supposed to sleep. As a result, one is bound to take flight and move from one branch of the tree to another. That was gonna be my opportunity which I really didn’t want to pass on so I can complement the pictures of Fruit Bats sleeping with pictures of them flying.

Obviously, because of how high in the trees they dwell, it was gonna be difficult to get a decent close up photo even with a telephoto lens mounted on the camera. Armed with a great deal of patience, I’ve explained to Ha that the gardens are truly beautiful and the shriek of Fruit Bats magical so we were gonna stick around and enjoy the heat while I would keep my camera on standby to snap a photo should any of the sleeping flying foxes get awaken and take flight. The pictures in the gallery below capture these beautiful, huge bats flying against the blue Cambodian sky: