Rude – Traveling Mark

Show Me How You Drive and I’ll Tell You Who You Are

A collision between a pedestrian and a motorcycle would likely result in far more damage to the pedestrian than to the motorcycle. Similarly, when a motorcycle and a car collide, the motorcycle would receive more severe beating than the car. The very same principle would apply each time you’d try to compare a clash between something that’s fundamentally bigger and stronger with something that’s incomparably smaller and weaker. Needless to say, the application doesn’t end with inanimate objects.

Photo: Cambodia - Motorcycle is More Dangerous so Bicyclist Will Be Cut Off

It’s fascinating how countries with highest incidence of violence also have the most arrogant and disrespectful drivers. It makes sense, after all that people who are arrogant and disrespectful with others in general, also take their arrogance and disrespect behind the wheel of a motor vehicle.

Take Your Hang-ups Behind the Wheel?

I noticed the bullying of pedestrians by car drivers and motorcyclists as soon as I started my round the world trip in Cambodia. I was the pedestrian myself so taking a note took as little as stepping outside of my hotel room. Immediately after leaving the premises of the Two Dragons Guesthouse where I stayed at the time, I was forced to jump off the way of every motorcycle in vicinity because wherever they rode, they were not stopping nor swerving for no stinking pedestrians.

As I observed soon after, all motorcyclists had to ride for their lives when a car rode down the road because a driver of the car would never slow down nor swerve to safely dodge the motorcycles. It was an obvious case of “if my vehicle is bigger and stronger than yours, I will harass you all I want and will never give you the right of way because for as long as I’m in a vehicle that’s bigger and stronger than yours, I’m bigger and stronger than you and that means I own you.”

Not surprisingly, going from being a bully to being bullied is as easy and fast as getting off the vehicle. People knew that as soon as their motorcycle got parked, it would be them who gets bullied. The obsession with abuse and harassment of those who are smaller and weaker was irrefutable.

Arrogant Driving and Violence

Countries with the most arrogant drivers notorious for never stopping or slowing down for pedestrians are also notorious for having some of the world’s highest incidences of domestic violence, rape and intentional homicide. It truly comes as no surprise that someone who wouldn’t hesitate to use their stronger build against another person who’s physically weaker, would behave in the same way on the road.

Why do you think countries with low traffic related death rate and defensive drivers who instinctively stop for pedestrians, such as Iceland, Sweden, Norway, New Zealand or Singapore are also some of the safest countries in the world? Likewise, why do you think some of the most dangerous countries in the world, such as Brazil, Mexico, Thailand, the Philippines or Cambodia also have some of the most arrogant and disrespectful drivers who would want to beat you up after running you over for not clearing your stinky self out of their precious path?

A typical scenario from a dangerous country would go something like this: you’re walking down a sidewalk minding your own business when a motorcycle forces itself right before you, cutting you off without any form of regard for your presence. Because running into you is unlikely to cause any noteworthy damage to the motorcycle but can easily crush your legs, the motorcyclist will not slow down or keep safe distance.

As a result, not only were you forced to abruptly interrupt walking, but in order to continue, you’ll have to tour around the motorcycle and step on the road. Since you’re still in a dangerous country, by stepping on the road you are getting in the way of other motorcycles and cars which will not swerve or slow down for the exact same reason why the original motorcyclist didn’t – you are a pedestrian which means you pose about as much danger to them as crippled pensioner in wheelchair does to a mob of thugs. They will pay no regard to you being in danger. They are driving so they are more dangerous than you hence if you want to avoid an encounter and save your life, it’s up to you to get out of their way. They will not and they don’t care.

The Strong vs The Weak

I have never, not once in my 36 years of life hit a girl. I haven’t even as much as raised my hand as if about to hit one. I was involved in verbal arguments and got, on a few occasions, hit by a girl myself (thought years of martial arts training made me deflect it), however being pretty well built and having a biological advantage over women by being a man (men are on average 10% taller, 20% heavier and 30% stronger than women), I have never responded by striking back.

Naturally, when I drive, I irrevocably respect all traffic participants, especially those who are in a weaker momentary position then myself. Not only do I never endanger a pedestrian or a person on a bicycle, I first and foremost make sure I don’t even restrict them in any way. The car gives me a strength advantage over pedestrians or bicyclists which presents a need to show them extra respect.

This is the very same reason which would make a gentleman open a door for a lady and assist her in getting through safely. Being a man, he has the strength advantage over a woman so he could easily force his way through the door first and rough the woman off her feet if she didn’t get off his precious way, but that’s precisely why a true gentleman would not do in the first place.

When you have something which makes you more privileged over another but give them preferential treatment because they don’t have that advantage – that’s when you show greatness as a human being. Threatening a disadvantaged person with force so you can have your right of precious passage doesn’t make you stronger. It makes you a pathetic loser with zero honor and dignity.

People who are not gentlemen and would rough their way through the door if a weaker person tried to get through at the same time are the very same people who rough their way down the road in a motor vehicle when weaker traffic participants, such as pedestrians are trying to cross safely. Their manhood issues, closed mind and selfish ego prevent them from being courteous so they act like the world spins around them and everyone needs to quit doing whatever they’re doing and bow down to their glorious presence.

Show Me How You Drive and I’ll Tell You Who You Are

I despise the strong who exploit the weak. Instead of using their gift of strength to help those who were dealt a weaker hand, they abuse it to fix their complexes by playing tough guys and oppressing the ones who are unlikely to stand up for themselves and fight back.

You can tell a lot about a man by the way he drives. Arrogant, disrespectful drivers who never slow down for pedestrians are no different than a man who beats his wife, a sixth grader who bullies a first grader, an angry fat kid who kicks a puppy on a leash, a gang of thugs with baseball bats who beat on an elderly woman in wheelchair, a soldier who sexually violates a prisoner of war or a force with tanks, unmanned drones, satellite guided missiles and billion dollar intelligence which launches attacks against nations without tanks, unmanned drones, satellite guided missiles or billion dollar intelligence.

The strong who heal their complexes by exploiting the weak exhibit a severe lack of self worth. They are bullies who feed their need to feel important and respected by preying on physically weaker or otherwise disadvantaged individuals. Since motorcycles or cars makes them bigger, stronger and more dangerous, they use them to boost up their size and with it their ego. It is therefore true that if you show me how you drive, I’ll tell you who you are.

Why Everybody Hates Tourists from America

This notion that the American tourists are obnoxious and nobody likes them has been around for a very long time. Where it came from, who started it and what substantiated it is unknown to me. It just somehow spread around, everybody knows about it and it’s considered to be an unspoken truth of international travel.

Needless to say – I was just as aware of the notion as everybody else is when I started my trip around the world. Still, I never took it for anything more than an urban legend that never goes away.

I spent two years traveling around South East Asia and had several encounters with travelers from the USA, but none of the encounters was long and/or deep enough to draw solid conclusions on. Things however started to come to a different light during my two month stay in Kota Kinabalu in Sabah, Malaysian Borneo.

Photo: Rainforest Lodge in Kota Kinabalu Where I Was Shown Why Everybody Hates American Tourists

I interrupted travelling and settled for two months to wait out the Christmas and New Year holiday seasons, to avoid needlessly overpaying the way I was forced to the year prior in Thailand.

World Challenge Borneo

During the course of my two months long stay in Kota Kinabalu, I had over a dozen encounters with groups on World Challenge tours. I spoke briefly with participants and the conclusion I drew from them was that these were spoiled kids of wealthy parents. For $6,000 a month, these kids got to see orangutans, hiked the headhunter’s trail, climbed Mount Kinabalu, visited caves, trekked jungles to reach spots where Rafflesia – largest flower in the world grew and did a whole lot of other things kids whose parents can’t afford to shell out $6,000 a month could never get to do.

On their month long Borneo Adventure, the World Challenge kids also made a stop in Kota Kinabalu and it just so happened, that many groups stayed in the Rainforest Lodge on Beach Street where I stayed. Each group consisted of people from the same area – they clearly knew one another quite possibly because they attended the same school or lived in the same neighborhood.

The fact that groups were not compiled of randomly selected individuals from different parts of the world could be easily observed by the fact that participants from each group spoke the same accent. The first group I had an encounter with were British. They were vastly respectful people, if a bit loud but only in the restaurant or other public areas.

Group of Australians which came in next was easily the nicest. Despite there being about 15 of them in the group, they kept their noise at acceptable levels affording other patrons to get peaceful rest.

Everything changed after the Aussies had left and a group of Americans checked in…

Obnoxious Americans

One would have to try really hard to find anything unpleasant about the experience with Aussie or British participants of the World Challenge Borneo who spent the Kota Kinabalu part of their tour in the Rainforest Lodge. Perhaps the only drawback was the need to wait for a long time just to get a turn at a toaster during lodge’s complimentary breakfasts. It was nowhere near the same when the Americans checked in.

There was yelling down the hallway at all times. There was slamming of doors so hard whole building shook in its base. There was banging on the walls and doors of other rooms as they kept chasing one another up and down the hallway like nobody else lived there. There was spit all over door knobs and floor cause they thought it was funny. There was…

The following day, when I came down to the restaurant to have breakfast, I overheard every other guest complaining about “those people who spent the entire night banging and yelling and rudely bad mouthing everyone who dared to ask them to keep the noise down“. Patrons from the same floor got no sleep whatsoever – I was one of them. Patrons from downstairs didn’t fare much better complaining of too much noise from what sounded like a heard of bisons chased by a pack of wolves on the upper floor.

Regardless, patrons from downstairs at least didn’t have to walk on floor covered with mud because the American kids thought it was funny to play a slide down the hallway, didn’t have to watch what they grab opening their door in order to avoid getting someone else’s spit on their hands and definitely didn’t get the noise level of us whose beds were right next to their screaming yaps.

This torment lasted for two nights. None of the rest of us who also stayed at the Rainforest Lodge thought it could get any worse after the first sleepless night, but the Americans made a point at outdoing themselves and made their second night twice as painful. With bloodshot eyes and nerves pushed to the limit, the relief we all felt after they’d checked out was epic.

Rainforest Lodge fell quiet again. It was possible to go to the room and take an afternoon nap. It was possible to get on a laptop and respond to emails without a headache. It was possible to use shared bathroom and not walk on pissed on floor. It was, afterall, just the way you would expect it to be when you patronize a temporary accommodation establishment.

The Return of the Americans

I was not the only traveler who chose Rainforest Lodge for a longer term stay. Decent discounts were available for those who prepaid for a week or more in advance which is what I took advantage of. Several other travelers did that too and since I used to see them at complimentary breakfasts and in the computer lounge, we all acknowledged to one another the relief we felt after the departure of the Americans.

Unfortunately, it didn’t last long. The same group of obnoxious and rude World Challenge participants from the United States of American came to stay at the Rainforest Lodge for two more nights a couple of weeks later. And just as was the case of the first time around, they turned everybody’s stay into hell.

All one could hear from other patrons was:

“No wonder everybody hates f$%king Americans”

…and I had to agree. All of a sudden, the notion that everybody hates tourists from America – the notion I thought was unsubstantiated, an urban legend if you will, took on a real form and proved itself as deserved, reasonable and warranted.

Sure, one can’t judge the entire nation based on action of a small group, but why was there such blatant difference between groups of the same age youth from other parts of the world? The only thing that set the group of rude, bothersome individuals from groups of respectful, decent people was the fact that the former were from the United States of America and the other from elsewhere. Could there be a pattern here we’d be fair not to overlook or ignore?

What this experience taught me was that in many common life situations, when people of other nations behave in a civilized way, showing respect for another by not interfering with their course of life in a negative way, the Americans do the opposite. Their complete disregard for another and expectance for others to put up with whatever they do because they are Americans makes them arrogant pricks who more than deserve the reputation that ushers their arrival.

Is Cambodia Barrier Free?

Well here is a question – Is Cambodia Barrier Free? Cambodia, the country of world’s worst drivers and some of the world’s most severe personal safety issues – is it barrier free? This is without doubt a legitimate question as many travellers who like to visit foreign countries either suffer from disabilities themselves, or have someone with them who is disabled. So is Cambodia barrier free enough for them to safely move around? The short answer is simple – “No”. But let me elaborate with the long answer a little.

When talking about barrier free countries, one could divide them into several groups:

Barrier Free Countries – many western countries, such as my homeland of Canada strive excessively to be completely barrier free and most people with disabilities truly can make their way around without major issues
Tricky Countries – moving around if you are a person with disabilities can be tricky, but can be done with some planning or little assistance
Not Barrier Free Countries – some countries, such as Cuba have narrow, cobblestone streets that are tricky to navigate through, however locals are more than happy to help without being asked for it. When they see someone in need of assistance, they will be right there to assist
Barrier Full Countries – those would be the countries that are very difficult, or impossible to effortlessly enjoy by the people with disabilities
Forget It Countries – barriers exist in all walks of life making an enjoyable stay for people with disabilities an impossibility
Cambodia – you take the most advanced barriers that prevent people with disabilities to navigate through, combine them into an impenetrable maze, enhance the level of difficulty by infinity and then add some extra barriers on top of it and you get Cambodia. If you find yourself in need of assistance, instead of being helped, you will be laughed at and mocked straight in your face. Cambodians don’t help others, only themselves. If there is something in it for them, then you will suddenly have more than enough of them willing to assist. Unconditional help doesn’t exist

Cambodia is not, by any stretch of imagination a barrier free country. People with disabilities will find it impossible to exist in Cambodia however Cambodia is also full of barriers and danger even for fully able bodied people. You do not have to be disabled to find it impossible to move around or otherwise exist in Cambodia. To add insult to injury, though – if you come to Cambodia as a fully able bodied, healthy and fit person, Cambodia will put you through some unfathomable dangers so if you leave the country in the same condition you have entered in, you can congratulate yourself for achieving the unimaginable.

In other words, Cambodia is not barrier free for people with disabilities, yet it’s not barrier free for people without either. And if you come to the country without any disabilities, you got to be extremely alert and careful at all times or else you could soon earn yourself some.

Road traffic is so dangerous in Cambodia, that no matter what means of transportation you choose to use during your stay, you will be constantly in danger of getting involved in a deadly accident. However the smaller the vehicle, the bigger a danger. Riding a motorcycle or a bicycle are particularly dangerous activities and one has to be more than careful and have their eyes affixed on the road with peripheral vision checking out the situation in all angles at all times. Yet the biggest danger faces you each time set out for a walk.

Photo: Motorcycles Blocking the Sidewalk in Siem Reap

Cambodians are extremely rude and self important people who need to repeatedly boost their egos (some say it’s the genitals they need to compensate for, but you will find both males and females behaving that way). You will be shown no respect from other traffic participants and if you’re a foreigner, the respect will be that much lower. Because sidewalks are unavailable for use by pedestrians because they serve as parking spots for cars, motorcycles and tuk-tuks, each time you go for a walk, you will be forced to walk on the road directly in the way of disrespectful drivers. Even though Cambodians should drive on the right, you will have traffic coming at you from both sides. It will be topped up by people pushing food carts around forcing you to go to the middle of the road to get by them and that’s where it starts getting super dangerous.

Yet the gravest danger lurks out from the side, where you would least expect it. Cars and bikes parked on the sidewalks – on those sidewalks you cannot use because they are parked there – will reverse into the traffic without any regard for pedestrians who are forced to walk on the road. They will back right into you unless you jump off their way and that’s where any form of being “barrier free” ends. You will have to be extremely vigilant and alert at all times to avoid getting disabled by a rude driver entering the road from a sidewalk and this will happen to you a hundred times a day.

The fact that you will be pressured, stared down and laughed at each time you get blocked off so you have nowhere to go makes safe decision making extremely challenging. Verbal abuse will be evident and you will know you are a subject to mockery but you will have no option but to take it right where they serve it to you. Many Cambodians carry guns and they are fully aware of the fact that law is not enforced in their country (none exists to begin with). There is nothing preventing them from blowing your brains off if you stand up for yourself. They are used to killing and raping so just take the humiliation and abuse and keep your eyes wide open because another out of control motorcycle is riding down the wrong side of the street and there’s no way he’s stirring away from a pedestrian.

Below is the video that briefly shows how “barrier free” Cambodia is. It’s one of those countless cases where I was walking down the street and because of piled up motorcycles, tuk tuks and cars I had to get on the road facing bikers swishing by me from both sides. Soon after I had a car that was parked on the sidewalk start reversing onto the road, completely disregarding the fact that a pedestrian was coming and had I not responded swiftly by slowing down when I noticed the reverse lights come on, I would have been struck by it. This is by no means an isolated incident. This happens all the time and then some. Motorcyclists don’t even seem to shoulder check at all. They are particularly happy to hit you with their two wheelers.

Cambodians Are Extremely Rude Towards Tourists

The very first thing you notice upon your initial encounter with native Cambodians is that they are extremely pushy and aggressive. The very second thing you notice is that Cambodians are extremely rude and take great joy at making tourists feel uncomfortable. They take great joy at other people’s misfortune and/or suffering regardless of whether they are foreigners or fellow Cambodians, but the joy of laughing at foreigners and making them feel uncomfortable with purposefully loud remarks aimed at their person is a double score.

You know the “10 points” joke we make in western countries? It refers to the GTA style computer games and you use it while driving. If you’re on an open road with no other vehicles ahead of you and an elderly person comes grinding slowly across the road, you make an inappropriate remark that you have “10 points” right ahead of you. It implies that if you floored the gas pedal and pancaked the elderly, you’d earn yourself sweet-arsed 10 points. As it goes, if it’s an elderly person with a walker that crosses the street, then you’re looking at scoring mighty “15”.

Something of that sort happens as a daily routine among Cambodians. Locals of this country are the laziest people in the world who refuse to go to work and instead spend their entire days bored out of their minds, sitting on their motorcycles, killing time by entertaining themselves any way they can. But by just sitting outside with nothing to do, their only source of entertainment are people who come into view.

Photo: Groups of Lazy, Bored Out Of Their Minds Canbodians Can Be Found on Every Corner

If something you’d normally consider a “not a big deal” happens to you – for example if you were pulling smokes out of your pocket and the box fell on the ground so you’d have to bend over to pick it up – you’d hear those locals laugh out loud like they’re watching Tom and Jerry. It was nothing worthy of mentioning that happened to you and in all other countries you would just pick it up and go without anyone ever winking an eye, but that’s not the case of Cambodia. Cambodians are extremely malicious and any chance to laugh at another that offers itself is taken a complete and thorough advantage of.

Now, if something more noteworthy happens to you – you slip and fall, for example – then the bored-out-of-their-minds Cambodians will explode with laughter. In any civilized country people would either try to help you or if you can help yourself, they would pretend that they didn’t see your misfortune so as not to make you feel uncomfortable, but that’s not the case of Cambodia. Locals here take great joy at making everyone and everything feel uncomfortable and will not miss out on any opportunity to show how rude and spiteful they are.

But it doesn’t end there. Cambodians will also laugh at you when they should be the ones to be laughed at. For example if you come to a store and there is nobody to serve you. Or imagine you are riding a bicycle, you get to a gate you need to get through in order to get somewhere but you can’t get across because lazy Cambodians who are killing time have their motorcycles parked there. They will loudly laugh at you for their own stupidity, for not realizing that they are blocking a passage by unqualified parking.

And as mentioned with the “10 points” example above, just as you get 15 points for running over an elderly with a walker, they feel extra entertained when they see a foreigner in a tight situation.

But scoring up foreigners doesn’t end with the lazy types who sit around whole day. This principle also applies to road crossing itself and since Cambodia is known for having the worst drivers in the world with sidewalks blocked up with motorcycles forcing you to walk on busy streets, you will have thousands of bikes and cars to dodge each time you decide to take a walk. And if you take into account the traffic rules of Cambodia, as a pedestrian, you are on a complete end of the traffic food chain with absolutely nobody paying any respect to you. It will be your responsibility to watch out for the traffic which will come at you from all sides, including the sidewalks. Yet as a foreigner, if you fail to keep a keen eye on traffic to safely dodge the vehicles, it will be like scoring mighty 15 for running over an elderly with a walker. In Cambodia, hitting a foreigner is like hitting a jackpot on a VLT.

Yet this is all still something you can avoid. What you can’t avoid in Cambodia is being continuously and uninterruptedly harassed by the Tuk Tuk drivers, touts and other scam artists. They are all extremely aggressive and don’t take “No” for an answer. I’ve been all over South-East Asia but no other country has scam artists who are this much in your face and this ruthless. You will have to deal with hundreds of them every day, oftentimes approaching you with deliberate intentions to make you feel pressured. If there is a group of a dozen Tuk Tuk drivers one right next to another, even though they will all hear you say “No, thank you!” to the first one, they will still each get in your face as though this will ever make you reconsider not riding with any of them.

But this is only the beginning. After politely responding that you were OK and didn’t need anything today, you will have them say something to each other in their native tongue loud enough to ensure that you can hear it and will have themselves one hell of a laugh to make you feel as uncomfortable as possible. If this discomfort results in you tipping over a curb or anything of sorts, this will be again like scoring the mighty 15.

If you make a local friend of opposite sex with whom you will go somewhere, hostile Cambodians will continue making extremely rude remarks both at you and at her (or him, if you’re a girl with a local male). Then you will know clearly how rude they really are because your companion will be targeted as well and they will tell you what remarks were used.

Of course, rudeness of Cambodians doesn’t end there. You will be stared down on every step of your stay in Cambodia. The more dangerous an individual, the more they will stare you down, laugh at you in front of your face and otherwise look for (provoke) trouble. Cambodians do not care about being friendly. They are only falsely friendly when there is a chance to easily make money off of you. Discrimination in Cambodia is prevalent and the locals will do anything to make you feel out of place. As sad as it is, it’s time that someone called a spade a spade.